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Shiny, happy!

Happy, happy…JOY!

Joy, joy, joy!

{intense levels of gratitude}



If you’ve spent any amount of time in personal and spiritual development circles over the last probably ten years, you’ll have come across blog posts {and sometimes entire blogs} like this. Written by the Shiny Happy People {SHP}, they’re notable for their constant-ultra-positive tone and pervasive belief that all you need is an attitude of gratitude for life to be fine.

Lost your job? Be grateful – you’re one step closer to your calling.

Partner cheating on you? Be grateful – you’re one step closer to your twin flame.

Sick in bed for days? Be grateful – you’re releasing soooooo many toxins darling.

Most of us have enough self-knowledge and self respect to tell the SHPs to sod off when they try to gratitude us out of major life challenges. we know that big things like death and birth and relationship breakdowns take time to work through.

Where SHP are really dangerous is when you’ve got a case of the can’t-be-fcukeds {CBFs}

Because when you’re dealing with a low level funk, trying to gratitude and joy your way out of it is damn tempting.

When life just looks a little gray, a little bit of shiny happy can brighten things up again.

Because when you’re feeling a little vulnerable and you don’t know why, it’s easy for the SHPs to convince you they’re right.

Trust me, I’m not bagging positivity here. I believe we get what we focus on, so seeing the bright side of where we are is important.

But…we are human, and to try to deny the emotional ups and downs that this human journey gives us is just insulting.

We have physical bodies…and if they are tired, run down or sick, we’re allowed to be grumpy.

To deny this essential truth is to strip us of learning moments and the chance to grow.

SHP want to fast forward us through these moments, back into the land of glittery unicorn farts.


Because they’re not comfortable with their own rawness and humanness.

Because they’re not strong enough to ride the downs as well as the ups.

Ultimately, because they’re scared.

But not you. You’re strong, and real, and vulnerable and ready to grow. And letting your CBF moments be opportunities for growth means you’ll be better equipped to deal with the big scary life moments when they inevitably come.


Sit with it. Acknowledge it. Honour the feeling of the moment.

Feel down into the roots of it. There’s always a lesson – work out what it is now. You don’t need to do anything with the knowledge, just file it away for future reference.

Take one step towards feeling better. That doesn’t mean going all SHP. Feeling better might mean having a good cry.

Repeat as necessary.

If you want to ditch the SHP and work on accepting, feeling and growing, then sign up for my newsletter. You’ll get access to my resource library, which is growing fast with practical tools for living mindfully {yes, I said it…}

{One important thing. If your CBF moment goes on and on and on….it might be more than just CBF. Depression is real and is amazingly clever at hiding itself within in low-level funky feelings. If you’re worried, talk to someone. Your doctor. Lifeline. Partner, parent, friend. Just promise me you’ll get the help you need.}

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